Best Books For Self-Confidence And Self-Esteem


Hey there! If you’re looking to boost your self-confidence and self-esteem, you’re in the right place. We all have moments of self-doubt and insecurities, but the good news is that there are many ways to build confidence and feel better about ourselves.

One of the most effective ways is to read books that can guide and inspire us on this journey. That’s why I’ve compiled a list of my favorite books for self-confidence and self-esteem.

In 2022 I began reading one self-help book a month, all focused on different issues that I wanted to work on to improve myself.  I am loving this journey and have already seen improvements in my own self-esteem.

I believe that the more knowledge we have, the better decisions we can make and the higher our sense of confidence will be.  Self-confidence and self-esteem are incredibly important to lead a happier life – and these books can help you get there.

I highly encourage you to create your own reading list and pick up one or more of the books that I’ve listed below.

Whether you have a hard time making friends (social anxiety), you feel like you’re faking your way through life (imposter syndrome) or you just want to feel more comfortable in your own skin, these books can help you to overcome your obstacles and reach your full potential.

But, before I list my favorite books on this topic, let’s talk a bit about what confidence and self-esteem are and why having them is so very important.

What Is The Difference Between Self-Confidence And Self-Esteem?

The terms self-confidence and self-esteem are often used interchangeably, but they actually mean different things.

Self-confidence is a person’s belief in their ability to successfully perform tasks or achieve goals. It is the inner feeling of being able to take on the world and do what needs to be done.

On the other hand, self-esteem is a person’s overall opinion of themselves. It’s their inner judgment and evaluation of their own worth, abilities, and attributes.

Self-esteem is often seen as a personality trait, which means it tends to be stable and enduring.

positivepsychology.com

In order to have high self-confidence, you need to have at least some degree of positive self-esteem. As you gain confidence in your ability to do something or reach a goal, it boosts your self-esteem.

At the same time, having high self-esteem can lead to greater self-confidence. When you believe in and have positive regard for yourself, you are more likely to take risks and attempt challenging tasks–knowing that even if you fail, it won’t define who you are.

The key difference between self-confidence and self-esteem is that confidence is focused on your ability to do something or accomplish a goal, while self-esteem focuses more broadly on how you feel about yourself as an individual.

They’re both important components of mental health and well-being, but they are not one and the same.

Why Is It Important To Have Self-Confidence And Self-Esteem?

Having self-confidence and self-esteem is important because it allows us to feel positive about ourselves, which can then lead to greater success in our lives. It helps us build better relationships with others, makes us more resilient when facing challenges, and gives us the courage to take risks.

Having self-confidence and self-esteem also helps us in our public speaking endeavors. It gives us the necessary confidence to voice our ideas, opinions, and experiences in front of large groups of people without fear.

Lack of confidence and self-esteem can lead to feelings of insecurity, low self-worth, and even depression. People who lack confidence often don’t pursue their goals or dreams because they feel they are not capable. This can prevent them from reaching their full potential in life.

A mindset of positive thinking allows us to tackle any obstacle or criticism that may come up during our speeches with grace and dignity. It can help us develop our speaking skills and increase our value as a speaker.

Low self-esteem, on the other hand, can lead to a lack of motivation and difficulty making decisions. It can be challenging to feel positive about yourself when you have low self-esteem, which can keep you from reaching your goals or trying new things.

Having a healthy level of confidence and self-esteem also encourages us to pursue our goals and dreams, which can help us lead happier and more fulfilling lives. Having self-confidence and self-esteem is essential for leading a healthy and successful life.

By believing in ourselves, we are able to take on new challenges with confidence, stay focused on our goals, and strive for success. When we have confidence in our abilities, we are more likely to take risks, which can help us learn and grow.

This can lead to better job opportunities, improved relationships, increased self-esteem, and overall greater happiness in life.

Our confidence and self-esteem also play a role in how others perceive us. When people see us as confident and competent individuals, it can open up doors to more job opportunities and social acceptance.

Furthermore, having strong self-esteem can help us maintain healthy relationships with others and make it easier to deal with difficult situations that may arise.

So if you want to lead a successful life, it is important to take care of your self-confidence and self-esteem. You can do this by setting achievable goals and working hard to reach them. Doing things that make you feel good about yourself, like exercising or spending time with loved ones, can also help boost your self-esteem.

It can be hard to take the first step towards improving self-confidence and self-esteem, but it is an essential part of living a healthy and fulfilling life. Understanding the importance of these qualities and taking steps to ensure that we are actively boosting ourselves is essential for us to be able to live our best lives.

Can Self-Confidence Be Taught?

Yes, of course, self-confidence can be taught, learned, and developed. While some people may be naturally more self-confident than others, self-confidence is not normally an innate or fixed trait, and it can be improved with practice and effort.

There are many strategies and techniques that can help you build and strengthen your self-confidence, such as:

  1. Identifying and challenging inner critic of negative thoughts and limiting beliefs.
  2. Setting achievable goals and celebrating your successes.
  3. Building a support network of positive and encouraging people.
  4. Practicing self-care and maintaining a healthy lifestyle.
  5. Stepping out of your comfort zone and taking calculated risks.
  6. Learning new skills and competencies.
  7. Accepting and learning from failures and mistakes.
  8. Cultivating a growth mindset and focusing on progress rather than perfection.
  9. Developing a positive and resilient attitude towards challenges and setbacks.
  10. Seeking professional help, such as therapy or coaching, to work through deeper insecurities and issues.

Remember, developing self-confidence is a process, and it takes time, effort, and patience. However, with the right mindset and approach, anyone can learn to be more self-confident and achieve their goals.

Do Books Really Help With Confidence?

Well, I know from my own experience that books can be a great source of motivation and inspiration.

For me, when I’m feeling stuck or feel that I can’t make progress in an area, often the best way for me to get out of that rut is to pick up a book that’s related to the subject.

Although I do have to admit, I love the self-help genre the best. I call it my counselor on the shelf.

For me, books have been a fantastic resource for building my self-confidence. Reading about the experiences and insights of others can be empowering and inspiring, as it showed me that I am not alone in my struggles and that there are ways to overcome them.

Self-improvement books on confidence and self-esteem can provide valuable advice, tips, and strategies for developing self-confidence and overcoming self-doubt. They can also help us to challenge our negative self-talk and limiting beliefs and provide tools for cultivating a positive and resilient mindset.

Of course, reading a book alone is not enough to develop self-confidence, but it can be a great starting point and a valuable complement to other confidence-building practices. So, if you’re looking to boost your confidence and self-esteem, why not give a self-improvement book a try?

You never know what insights and inspiration you might find!

So, grab a cup of coffee (or tea), get cozy, and let’s dive into the world of self-improvement books!

20 Of The Best Self-Help Books To Help Build Self-Confidence

Okay, so let’s get my list of the best self-confidence books that I recommend.

Coffee Self Talk by Kristen Helmstetter (my top pick)

I love this book because it really helped me to focus on the good things in myself and my life. It’s a great reminder to be kind to yourself and to believe in yourself.


The Confidence Code: The Science and Art of Self-Assurance—What Women Should Know” by Katty Kay and Claire Shipman

This book is a New York Times Bestseller! It’s a great resource for women who want to develop their confidence and self-assurance. It’s filled with scientific research and anecdotes from successful women which makes it both informative and inspiring. This book will help readers understand the science behind confidence and how to cultivate it in their lives.


Can’t Hurt Me: Master Your Mind and Devy the Odds by David Goggins

This book is an inspiring memoir of David Goggins, a former Navy SEAL and ultramarathoner who overcame significant obstacles in his life to become successful. He shares his story of resilience, courage, and determination which can help readers achieve their personal goals no matter how challenging it may seem.


The Unfair Advantage: How You Already Have What It Takes To Succeed by Ash Ali and Hasan Kubba

In The Unfair Advantage, Ali and Kubba provide an inspiring guide to help readers uncover their unique abilities and use them to succeed. It examines long-term success strategies that can be used in any field or industry, including creating a plan for your future, developing a growth mindset to overcome challenges, and tapping into the power of networks.


You Are A Badass: How To Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life by Jen Sincero

This self-help book aims to help readers overcome self-doubt, fear, and negative beliefs, in order to achieve their goals and live an amazing life. Sincero shares personal anecdotes, practical advice, and actionable exercises to help readers identify and break through their limiting beliefs and embrace their inner badass.


The Gifts Of Imperfection by Brene Brown

This is an inspiring book that encourages readers to embrace their imperfections and use them as a source of strength. The book explores topics such as self-acceptance, vulnerability, courage, and resilience in order to help readers achieve true authenticity and find joy in life. By recognizing our flaws and embracing our authentic selves, we can create a life filled with true meaning and purpose.


Do the Work: The Official Unrepentant, Ass-Kicking, No-Kidding, Change-Your-Life Sidekick to Unfu*k Yourself by Gary John Bishop

Do the Work is an inspiring and practical guide for anyone looking to make a significant change in their lives. Written by Gary John Bishop, this book helps readers take personal responsibility for their own well-being and offers tools to help them manage their thoughts, emotions, and actions. It encourages readers to confront difficult situations head-on and use them as learning experiences to become stronger, more resilient people.


Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers

I recently read Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers, an inspiring and empowering book that has helped me to become more confident in my abilities and live a happier life. This book encourages readers to face their fears head-on and take the necessary risks in order to reach their goals. It helps readers become aware of their own inner power and how to use it to create the life they desire.


Atomic Habits by James Clear

Whenever I ask anyone about a book they would recommend on the topic of self-confidence and/or self-esteem, they always mention Atomic Habits! And they are right, it’s a great book for this topic. It completely changed how I think about forming habits. This book teaches readers how to form small, incremental changes in their life that will eventually lead to big improvements over time. It provides practical advice on how to break bad habits and replace them with healthier ones, helping you become more productive and successful.


The Confidence Gap by Russ Harris and Steven Hayes, PhD

The Confidence Gap by Russ Harris and Steven Hayes, Ph.D. is a great book for anyone looking to boost their self-confidence and learn new skills. The authors provide practical advice on how to recognize irrational thinking patterns that lead to lower confidence, as well as strategies for developing mental strength and resilience. Additionally, the book provides guidance on how to create an action plan for success, develop healthier habits and relationships, and set achievable goals.


The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem: The Definitive Work On Self-Esteem by Dr. Nathaniel Branden

The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem by Dr. Nathaniel Branden is a comprehensive look at the importance of self-esteem and how it affects all aspects of life. It delves into topics such as understanding the power of self-esteem and its positive impact on relationships, career success, health, and more.


Self-Confidence Training: A Practical Guide on How to Face Your Fears and Build Unshakable Self-Esteem by Sebastian O’Brien

This book covers techniques that can help readers overcome their fears and build unshakable self-esteem. It provides practical advice and actionable exercises that can help readers assess their current confidence levels and adopt a more positive mindset. It also explores topics such as how to set realistic goals, how to deal with failure, how to recognize success, and how to create an environment conducive to personal growth.


Unstoppable Self Confidence: How to create the indestructible, natural confidence of the 1% who achieve their goals, create success on demand and live life on their terms by Andrew Leedham

This great book teaches readers how to find the courage and strength to take risks, overcome obstacles, and remain focused on achieving success. The book emphasizes adopting a growth mindset, eliminating limiting beliefs, taking actionable steps towards progress and cultivating a maverick spirit.


Learning To Love Yourself by Gay Hendricks Ph.D.

This book encourages readers to build self-love by finding their true purpose in life, understanding their core values and beliefs, and cultivating relationships that support their growth. It also examines the importance of taking risks, expressing emotions honestly, and honoring your intuition. Through a combination of advice, exercises and stories from Gay’s own life experiences, readers can develop the fundamental building blocks of self-esteem and unlock their own potential for true happiness.


Self-Confidence for Men: Stop Being the Victim & Boost Your Self-Esteem by John Sonmez

Self-Confidence for Men by John Sonmez is an inspirational book that encourages men to take charge of their self-esteem and build a more positive outlook on life. The book offers practical advice and guidance on how to build strong relationships, improve communication skills and develop courage in order to become successful. With relatable anecdotes from the author’s life and experience, this book provides readers with the motivation needed to make positive changes in their lives and gain more confidence.


Stop Overthinking: 23 Techniques to Relieve Stress, Stop Negative Spirals, Declutter Your Mind, and Focus on the Present by Nick Trenton

This book by Nick Trenton is an inspiring guide to overcoming negative thought patterns, managing stress, and cultivating focus. It offers practical advice such as how to set boundaries, identify triggers, and use mindfulness techniques. With easy-to-follow steps, readers can learn how to become more mindful of the present moment and let go of worries about the future or regrets from the past.


Self Sabotage No More: Stop Repeating the Past and Start Creating Your Future by Jennie Potter

This is a helpful guide for anyone looking to break free from the patterns of self-sabotage that stand in the way of personal growth. The book provides insight and strategies for becoming more mindful, understanding how habits are formed, and taking action towards creating a brighter future. It offers advice and exercises to help identify and address the underlying reasons why you may be locked in a cycle of self-sabotage, as well as step-by-step guidance on how to transform your life.


Master Your Emotions: A Practical Guide to Overcome Negativity and Better Manage Your Feelings by Thibaut Meurisse

This essential guide to help readers gain control over their emotions and break free from a cycle of negative thinking. Through practical advice, exercises and techniques, the book provides readers with actionable steps for developing emotional intelligence, becoming more aware of their feelings, understanding how habits are formed and taking positive action to create lasting change.


Know Your Worth: How to build your self-esteem, grow in confidence and worry less about what people think by Anna Mathur

The book provides practical advice through exercises and reflections to help readers understand their own worth and strengthen their emotional resilience. It covers topics such as embracing vulnerability, setting boundaries, managing expectations of yourself and others, and engaging with positive self-talk. It also includes tips on dealing with criticism, comparing yourself to others, and creating a support system.


Bet On Yourself: How to Build Unshakeable Confidence, Tune Out the Noise, and Rise to the Occasion by Chris Mueller

This great book is focused on helping readers build self-esteem, confidence, and reduce the amount of worry they have about what others think. It encourages readers to take charge of their own happiness by providing actionable advice on how to be better advocates for themselves. Mueller also offers tips on how to make peace with one’s past and present, recognize the source of anxiety, set boundaries with people who are toxic, and create a plan for personal growth.


I do hope that these books can help you through your journey to find the self-confidence and self-esteem that you deserve to live your very best life.

Kat Clukey

I am so glad you are here, and have chosen to spend your time reading my blog. I'm a Life Coach through the Procter Gallagher Institute . Since 2013, I have been on an intense mission to read books, go to seminars, and generally turn myself inside out to find out why some people seem to feel good in their own skin while I've struggled with self-worth and low self-esteem most of my adult life. I hope you find insights that help you on your journey!

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