How To Gain Social Confidence


We all want to be confident in social situations, but for many of us, it’s easier said than done. Whether you’re attending a networking event or just trying to make new friends, feeling comfortable around other people can be daunting.

How do you gain social confidence? Be mindful of negative self-talk, keep your posture open and welcoming, practice talking to people, ask for help, and celebrate small victories.

With the right strategies and techniques, anyone can learn how to gain social confidence and become more at ease when interacting with others.

In this blog post, we’ll provide a few of our best tips on how to build your confidence in any social situation.

From mastering body language basics to cultivating healthy self-talk, these tactics will position you for success during any encounter with others. So let’s get started!

How Can I Be More Socially Confident And Outgoing?

When you follow these helpful tips and tricks, you’ll soon feel totally at ease when engaging with others.

First, it’s important to remember that body language is a critical factor in building confidence.

According to an article from the University of Texas, “communication is 55% nonverbal, 38% vocal, and 7% words only.”

In nonverbal communication, people subconsciously match up your facial expressions with postural body language. If your shoulders are hunched and you’re shifting around anxiously, you’re not only projecting low confidence, but you are feeling less confident.

So, when you are speaking or listening to someone else, make sure your posture is open and inviting—avoid crossing your arms or hunching over.

Welcoming facial expressions, eye contact, and smiling show confident body language and are key for conveying openness and friendliness – to your audience and to yourself. So don’t forget to straighten your shoulders and show those pearly whites!

Be mindful of your tone of voice, too. It sounds funny, but smiling (just a little bit) when you talk gives your voice a more positive inflection and makes you sound friendlier. Sounding friendly can help you have a more positive attitude in difficult situations.

Another great way to gain social confidence is to be mindful of what you’re saying to yourself.

Negative self-talk can bring on a lack of confidence in any situation, so practice replacing negative thoughts with more positive ones. Whenever you hear yourself thinking something unhelpful, take a few deep breaths and refocus on the present moment instead of getting caught up in anxious thoughts.

Try to build a community of supportive people around you. Whether it’s attending networking events or making an effort to take part in social events, surround yourself with positive, encouraging, confident people who will help lift your confidence levels.

Another thing you can try is to participate in activities outside of your comfort zone.

This could include taking a public speaking course, joining a club or organization that interests you, or volunteering. All of these will help you become more comfortable with meeting new people and having conversations with them.

You can also practice self-care like exercising and meditating to reduce stress and boost your confidence levels.

Finally, try to challenge yourself by talking to strangers whenever possible — it’ll make your fear of rejection easier to face. This doesn’t have to be an in-depth conversation: something as simple as asking for the time can help you feel successful and can encourage more social interaction.

How Do I Stop Being Socially Awkward?

That’s a really tough question and one that many people struggle with. However, the good news is that there are strategies you can use to become more socially confident.

Here are some tips that can help:

1. Practice makes perfect – It might sound cliche, but practice really does make perfect! Start with small steps like introducing yourself to someone new or making an effort to smile when you walk into a room full of strangers. As you get more comfortable in these situations, keep pushing yourself out of your comfort zone by increasing the number of social interactions you have.

2. Be yourself – One of the most important aspects of gaining social confidence is being true to who you are and not trying to be anyone else. People can tell when you’re faking it and putting up a front, and it can make them feel uncomfortable. So be yourself, be genuine, and people will appreciate your real self.

3. Develop strong communication skills – Being able to communicate effectively is key when gaining social confidence. Work on things like active listening, body language, and being able to confidently express yourself in conversations without feeling overwhelmed or anxious.

4. Take care of yourself – Self-care is essential when trying to gain confidence in social situations. Make sure you take time for yourself by exercising regularly, eating healthy meals, getting enough sleep each night, etc. Take time for yourself each day, whether it’s taking a few minutes out of your day to relax or doing something special just for you. All these things will help boost your mood and make it easier for you to feel confident and comfortable in social settings.

5. Surround yourself with positive people – Being around people who are supportive, encouraging, and kind can go a long way towards boosting your self-esteem and confidence. Find friends or family members that you can trust, and be sure to spend time with them whenever possible. This will help you feel more secure when engaging in social activities.

6. Put yourself out there – The best way to gain social confidence is to actually practice it! Start by attending events where people will understand and appreciate your real self, like yoga classes or meetup groups that focus on hobbies or interests which make you feel good about yourself. As you become more comfortable with these environments, try branching out even further by going to events that are unfamiliar.

Taking risks, like those involved when you start conversations or make small talk, can be frightening, but they are also an important part of growing and developing social confidence. Trying something new or taking on a challenge is the perfect way to build self-confidence in a manageable way.

7. Focus on building meaningful relationships – While it’s important to practice your social skills, try focusing more on developing real connections with the people around you. People LOVE to talk about themselves, so when you are heading into a new conversation with a stranger, the first step is to ask them an open-ended question about what type of work they do, their hobbies, sports teams they like, their volunteer activities, etc.

Also, treat everyone you meet with kindness and respect, and they will be likely to do the same for you in return. The more comfortable you become interacting with other people, the less intimidating socializing will seem.

8. Practice positive self-talk – Negative self-talk can be a major impediment when trying to build social confidence. To start, take note of the ways you talk to yourself. When you experience feelings of insecurity or self-doubt, try replacing those inner voices with positive affirmations instead. Remind yourself that everyone around you is just as human and fallible as you are.

9. Celebrate small victories – Building social confidence doesn’t happen overnight; it’s a process that requires hard work and patience. Focus on your progress rather than perfection when trying to become more confident in social situations. Even small successes can make a big difference in how comfortable you feel interacting with others.

Reward yourself for each victory no matter how small it may seem. This will help encourage and motivate you as you take baby steps towards becoming more confident in social situations.

10. Ask for help – Building social confidence is a challenge, but you don’t have to do it alone. Talk to close friends or family members who can lend support while you work on improving higher self-esteem.

You can also seek professional help if needed, such as therapy or counseling, especially if you are so terrified of social interaction that you may have social anxiety disorder. Talking to someone outside of your situation can help provide clarity and insight into how to best approach the task of becoming more socially confident.

11. Practice mindfulness – Staying mindful of your thoughts and feelings in any given moment is an important part of developing social confidence. Notice when you’re feeling uncomfortable or intimidated by a certain situation and try to focus on taking a slow, deep breath (or more!) rather than getting caught up in negative self-talk. Mindfulness practices like meditation can also be helpful for gaining perspective and reducing anxiety in challenging situations.

12. Find a mentor – If possible, find someone in your life who can provide guidance and help point you in the right direction when it comes to becoming more socially confident. Mentors are invaluable resources that can offer insight and advice into how to build your social confidence over time.

13. Don’t be afraid to fail – Everyone makes mistakes, and this is especially true when it comes to trying new things or getting out of our comfort zones. Just remember not to take yourself too seriously – failure is often a necessary part of personal growth, so don’t be afraid to try something new even if you’re unsure of how it will turn out!

14. Get feedback – Sometimes we need a bit of help to get out of our own heads and gain perspective on our own confidence levels. It can be beneficial to get an outside opinion from someone who knows you well – they may be able to provide insight into what areas you should focus on or offer advice that could help boost your confidence further.

15. Don’t take criticism too personally – Everyone gets criticized sometimes but remembering not to take it too personally is key to keeping your confidence high. Try to take criticism as constructive feedback and just use it as a way to better yourself.

With these 15 steps, you’ll be on your way to becoming a more confident version of yourself. And, with time and effort, you’ll find that you have the confidence to take on any challenge!

Remember: Building social confidence takes practice, so don’t be discouraged if you don’t see immediate results. Take it one day at a time, and celebrate even the smallest success as an important milestone. You’ve got this!

Exercises To Build Social Confidence

Exercises to build social confidence can be a great way to boost your self-esteem and help you own a room with confidence. Here are some exercises that can help you gain the social confidence you need:

1. Out and About: Go out into public places like the mall or park and practice interacting with people. Just say “hi” or ask the time or start a conversation about something ordinary, like the weather. The more comfortable you get talking to strangers, the more confident you’ll feel engaging in other conversations down the road.

2. Voice Exercises: Practicing speaking aloud can also be very beneficial when it comes to gaining social confidence. Start by reading books or articles out loud, then work your way up to speaking in front of a mirror. This exercise will help you get more used to hearing your own voice and talking to yourself, which can make it easier to talk to other people.

3. Practice Makes Perfect: If you want to practice socializing in a low-stakes environment, try joining an online community or group where you can interact with others without feeling judged. Or if you have any friends or family who are willing, practice having conversations with them in private before testing out your skills in public. The more familiar you become with conversing, the less of a challenge it will be when it comes time for real-life interactions.

4. It All Starts With You: Remember, the most important thing is that you have confidence in yourself. Once you can take control of your own thoughts and feelings, it will become much easier to engage with others around you. Visualize how successful conversations could go and tell yourself positive affirmations like ‘I’m worthy of being heard‘, ‘I am capable of connecting with other people‘. Doing this regularly will help boost your self-confidence, which can make it easier to talk to other people without the fear of rejection.

5. Fake It ‘Til You Make It: If you’re feeling particularly anxious, it’s okay to fake your confidence until you actually feel more sure of yourself. Take deep breaths when you start to feel overwhelmed, practice good posture and body language, put on a smile – these small gestures can make all the difference in how people perceive you. With enough practice and patience, eventually that fake confidence will become real!

Social Confidence Books You May Be Interested In

Here are some books that I recommend to help you build your social confidence.

How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships

This book has “92 easy and effective sure fire success techniques” that the author lays out to help you gain confidence for all social interactions, both big and small.


How to Talk to Anyone: Master Small Talk, Improve your Social Skills, and Build Meaningful Relationships

This book gives you ideas and tools for improving social skills, stopping negative self talk, and mastering small talk.


How to Talk to Anyone with Ease: 9 Crucial Skills to Connect with People, Master Small Talk, and Have Better Conversations Anytime

If you hate small talk and freeze up in social gatherings, “this book comes packed with smart tips and tricks to overcome your shyness, and helps you tackle social situations even when you’re an introvert.”


Wrapping Up

The bottom line takeaway is that gaining social confidence can be a difficult journey for many people, but it is achievable with the right techniques and mindset.

Take time to practice body language, set goals that you’re comfortable with and push yourself to attempt new challenges. Before you know it, you’ll be feeling more confident in your own skin and able to approach any social situation without fear of rejection. Good luck!

Kat Clukey

I am so glad you are here, and have chosen to spend your time reading my blog. I'm a Life Coach through the Procter Gallagher Institute . Since 2013, I have been on an intense mission to read books, go to seminars, and generally turn myself inside out to find out why some people seem to feel good in their own skin while I've struggled with self-worth and low self-esteem most of my adult life. I hope you find insights that help you on your journey!

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